


Not Without Lydia

by thatdragonchic



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: F/M, Stiles is a Mess, Stydia, lydia martin dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-07
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-08-07 07:59:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7706797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatdragonchic/pseuds/thatdragonchic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It all happened so fast, he just wanted something in life to last<br/>--<br/>Written for stydia-fanfiction</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Without Lydia

It all had happened so fast. Lydia took a bullet when she shouldn’t had to, falling to the floor in shock. He couldn’t hear a thing, he was just running, running to pull her back to life and he couldn’t, they were yanking her from him when it was too late. He couldn’t see and he couldn’t hear, he couldn’t even tell that he was begging and screaming. He was standing there watching them take his love away, take his life away, the next time he sees her she’s a corpse in a dress. And there he is, there she is. He wishes life wasn’t so cruel, he’s empty. 

He remebers seeing his mother like this, cold and lifeless, and for the first time in a long his mother looked so peaceful. He was sad but he knew his mother was in a higher place. But Lydia… for the first time in his life, he thought Lydia Martin was ugly. Death was a grave and cold mark on her that didn’t not make her look well at all. She was better alive, with her cheeks flushed and her eyes bright. She looked sad, and she looked rigid and he couldn’t help the mess that he was becoming. He loved her so much. 

It clicked why his father used to drink so much. If he can’t feel the pain, then it was like it never happened. Being dizzy and spinning and unable to remember she’s dead. He’s staring at her and he’s choking back tears. He’s staring at her and he never wants to stop. Why does everybody who loves him, leave? From the moment it happened to this very moment three days later, he hasn’t stopped pleading left and right to any god there was that if there was god then God would take him too. Stiles Stilinski refuses to live in a world without Lydia martin. Stiles Stilinski refuses to sit in a class where he know’s Lydia won’t follow. 

He’s begging left and right in silent prayers as they go to file into the pews. He whispers over and over every god foresaken prayer that might mean she could come back. Her skin flush with life and her eyes flutter awake like that. The tears that fall are so generous feeling, like his body is letting him be what his mind refuses to let him be: weak. And Stiles folds into himself and everybody hears him sob. Nobody in that room could possible be as broken as he was, everybody watches the butterfly fall with no grace, as it lands to the concrete without a single place. And he wants to tear at his insides, he wants to feel his blood gush on his fingertips. He wants to be where he’s meant to be, in a world where Lydia Martin still exists.

She may have saved her mother and Scott, but she killed him in the process. 


End file.
